Leon in "Bats."

MOVIE INFORMATION

With 10 as a must-see, Jack gives this film a: Stars: Lou Diamond Phillips and Leon Director: Louis Morneau Rated: PG-13, with profanity and shredded corpses Length: 90 minutes

ROCHESTERCRITIQUE

Having seen this film, how would you rate it? 10 5 9 4 8 3 7 2 6 1

By Jack Garner
Democrat and Chronicle

(Oct. 22, 1999) -- Bats is a fill-in-the-blank formula thriller, overly familiar and not very inspired.

Aspiring screenwriters should follow along on the time-tested, eight-step program:

1. An innocent young couple are brutally killed by surprise attack from a . . . (shark, crocodile, giant ape, dinosaur, flock of birds or in this case, bats).

2. A sympathetic scientist is brought in to help authorities deal with the crisis. Here, she's a zoologist (Dina Meyer) who fondly remembers her first encounter with a soft, cuddly bat in her parents' barn.

3. A local cop, ranger, general or in this case, sheriff joins forces with the scientist to protect the citizenry. Here, he's played by Lou Diamond Phillips, who wears hats and smokes cigars that are both too big.

4. Another scientist is revealed as the source of all the trouble, because he's performed genetic tests to alter the creatures, thereby making them more dangerous. The mad doctor in Bats (Bob Gunton) has created smart, lethal bats for the U.S. military. I can't begin to imagine why -- and it's never explained.

5. Government types act like fascist idiots, except for our sympathetic scientist and the one cop or sheriff who knows the scientist is right. In this case, the military flies in bombers to blow half of Texas to kingdom come.

6. More folks are killed by the rampaging creatures, usually because the stupid fools ignore warnings. This time it's dozens of residents of Gallup, Texas, who get ripped to shreds by the bats.

7. The evil scientist gets his just deserts, while we all cheer.

8. And finally, the good guys rally to cope with the creatures in an explosive confrontation.

We've been there, and we've done that. The only difference in this film from director Louis Morneau is that our heroes end up chest-deep in a river of bat droppings.

And that's a fitting place to conclude my review.